How about we just don't speak that into existence, hm? I feel like that's just asking for trouble in Abraxas.
[ It's a whine, but a whine with a mildly flustered blush all the same. She doesn't want to come blazing in to be anyone's hero or saviour. Sparring privately? Fine. But someone's life in the balance had been far too much work, far too much responsibility for her. The kidnappings had proven that much.
Okay, she hadn't been expecting him to throw his stupid sword into the air. Hilda's eyes follow it for only a brief moment before darting back down to him (training had been more effective on her than she otherwise claimed). She has to wonder what he's doing but she isn't going to stop - not with all this momentum.
So she does follow through on the strike - but bends her knees closet to the ground, changing the trajectory of her swing in an attempt to hook the back of her axe around his calf so she can tug him down. ]
Fair point.[They don't need another kidnapping adventure.
Alucard takes the fall. Lands flat on his back, sword clattering beside him. It is the easiest thing in the world to roll over towards it and rebound, aware that Hilda is at a three quarter angle from him now. He rushes, swiping for her mid section.]
You don't think we have anything to worry about that sort of thing anymore, do you?
[ The last several words are part gasp as she hollows out her stomach as if that would somehow stop the sword from what would definitely be a killing blow. Her axe is too low to the ground to block it but she has to do something – her cowardice practically demands it.
The downside(?) to being her brother's sister is that she had the misfortune to pick up grappling skills too. If you aren't in a position to stop the blade with yours, try to disarm them instead, Hilda.
She tries a risky move – twisting her body to let the blade pass through a gap in her arm as she reaches to try and trap his arm so he can't move it.
Which would also effectively mean dropping her own axe and pulling him close into an embrace. ]
I'm living in perpetual paranoia about it, honestly.
[His greatest fear happened again, he's never letting it go.
Alucard is a fan of using whatever one has at their disposal. It is why he'll shift forms in a fight if that's what it takes to get him out of a tight spot. He's all set to do just that when Hilda tries trapping his arm, because honestly. It's a good move. Enough to force him to stop and either call this much a draw or find a less animal based way out of the situation.
Embrace it is, even if Alucard totally ruins it with:] I could turn into bats right now, you know.
That's why you were so worried when we found you in the desert, wasn't it?
[ There's a gentle sympathy in her voice when she asks him. It's easier out of context to forget the state of him when they found him in the caves. She thinks him invincible, fearless, in some ways. It brings him down to a relatable level - not that she puts him up on a pedestal or anything. At least not as of late since getting to know him.
She realizes belatedly how close they are. It would be absolutely a little romantic - had it not been for that line. Her expression falls a little flat but the momentum she's still got pushes them several steps backwards, pressing into him. ]
Doesn't that fall under the vampire category? Can't we just have something nice like a little hug?
[ It transitions into more than a hug. Her feet trip over themselves, pitching her and her weight forward. ]
I was having flashbacks to what happened back home, yes.
[There's no point denying it, especially since Hilda knows the full truth of the situation there.
This is really getting quite ridiculous, and rather in defeat of the purpose of sparring.]
I'm fairly certain that in a fight, I'd have pushed you away or otherwise found a way to turn this into a fight with both of our weapons scattered to the wi--
[Hilda doesn't weigh that much, even with an axe. The problem is that it is unexpected. So Alucard takes both their weight and--
--okay, the angles are wild because his lips are definitely against Hilda's.
For a second time.
That's actually a novelty in and of itself, and the thought occupies Alucard's brain enough that he falls down on the ground entirely, aware that Hilda's being dragged along via momentum.]
Well I don't see you doing that. Holding onto you like this is exhausting! If you're going to do something shouldn't you be doing it -
[ It doesn't even occur to her that he won't stop their fall because, vampire. But she's cut off, not by the surprise that they were in fact falling, but because his lips were on hers.
The weight of gravity practically presses her lips to his. Her eyes widen and just as they hit the ground, she has just enough common sense to flatten her hands against his back pressing them even closer. She pulls back a hair's breadth, eyes still wide like saucers, brain just white noise but all too aware about his aversion to physical intimacy. ]
[Hilda you can't say no vampire nonsense and then expect vampire nonsense!
They've both made it weird now. Alucard for breaking the fall by just taking the fall, Hilda being a good friend and well aware that Alucard and physical intimacy is something he's still working on getting through. What it results in is the dhampir just staring at Hilda, wide eyed and not wanting to shove her off but absolutely feeling awkward about the situation and--
--he tries to focus on the thing they're supposed to be doing.]
[ * No vampire nonsense unless it means it could save them from this exact scenario.
Despite being clearly flustered she lets out a tittering laugh. ]
I'm sorry – yeah, a draw sounds good.
[ She has the sense to scramble off of him, righting herself. When she's up on her feet she extends a hand out to him to help pull him up. By the time he's on his feet, she's smiling like nothing had ever happened. That's the best way to address it, right? ]
Did you want to go again? Or maybe it's food time?
[THERE WAS NO FINE PRINT IN THAT CONVERSATION cut a dhampir a break Hilda!!!]
Best out of five?
[At least he didn't offer to be up for as many rounds as she was as i almost typed. Alucard takes the offered hand, happy to totally ignore what just happened. And vowing that Jaskier is soooooo not finding out.]
One skirmish does not count as a sparring session.
[ You should have looked closer and read the fine print before clicking accept on the terms and conditions, sorry!
Hilda can't help the immediate look of incredulousness on her face at his suggestion. ]
Best of five? Why not best of three or something?
[ Regardless of what they decide to land on, it’s clear by the end that she’s tiring. Months of not properly training and keeping up her stamina with a weapon in her hand shows. Objectively however, it’s clear that her body still remembers what she’s supposed to do and the axe still feels like an unfortunate extension of herself. The last round sees her splayed out on her back staring up at the sky. Her chest heaves and she can feel a bead of sweat begin to form in her hairline and trickle down her forehead.
The feel of it only spurs the whine that wrenches from her lips. ]
I’m exhausted, please tell me it’s dinner time now.
[It probably isn't a surprise that Alucard looks fairly put together in spite of the length of time they've spent romping about. There's a little sweat that means his shirt clings to his chest, but he's not panting. Not falling over. Nothing seems to remotely bother him, he might as well have gone for a walk in the park.
His sword is sheathed, and Alucard offers Hilda a hand up.]
[ At the confirmation she lets out a weary little cheer and a half-hearted fist pump to the sky.
Of course he looks fine. He looks fine in every sense of the word on any given day, even when he looks disheveled in the middle of a desert. She tries not to look too envious when he steps into view, and definitely brushes away the intrusive thought about what it would look like if he were more sweaty.
The offer is tempting. But as she takes his hand she gives him a bat of her eyelashes trying to look as pathetic as possible. ]
How about you just carry me instead as part of my consolation prize for losing so badly? I think my legs are jelly after that last round.
[ Obviously she had hoped he'd say yes but hoping that is a little different from actually having it happen. She tries not to look too surprised before nodding. Holding her axe is a small sacrifice if it means not having to walk after a training session.
Hilda pulls the axe across her lap, blade pointing away from Alucard before looking towards him expectantly. ]
[.......................oh he didn't think this was going to.
Wait.
He should have absolutely expected it, what is wrong with him.
Picking Hilda up is like carrying a pillow. It is easy to just scoop her up and wait just long enough so she can adjust the axe. Then he starts walking, the intended destination being the office he shares with Jaskier.]
This second part is not going to be a regular occurrence.
[ Bluff calls bluff, Alucard. Did you really think that she wouldn’t capitalize on an opportunity to be cradled close to someone’s well defined chest?
The way she settles right in with a not-so-hiddden smile on her face as they walk through the streets of Cadens looks something akin to a smug cat.
The faux-innocence of her voice could either be endearing or nauseating. ]
Are you sure? I think we should add it in as a consolation prize for all future training sessions. We can’t really expect the loser to have to walk all the way home after losing so badly, right?
[ She gasps, looking mildly offended at the suggestion. ]
You'd like that, wouldn't you? But there's no way I could actually beat you in a fight even if you lost on purpose.
[ Also losing on purpose is her thing. He needs to find his own thing. ]
Also, how would I carry you? You're so much taller than me.
[ Said as if she hadn't carried Claude after a particularly long training session or when she had found him snoring and hunched over a table with books surrounding him. It is do-able - but she isn't going to let Alucard know that. ]
[He grins, smug, and keeps moving forward. This really isn't a problem, but it's more fun to tease about failing to account for Alucard throwing a match.]
If you're so worried about carrying me, then don't throw out suggestions someone that aren't equitable to all parties.
[ To say that she looks completely unimpressed with the thought of something that she can absolutely see him doing is an understatement. ]
That's hardly the gentlemanly thing to do! Even if I could carry you, don't you think that would look silly? You don't want to look silly, do you?
[ She shifts slightly in his hold, mindful of the position of her axe. Her protest draws the looks of several of the locals as they pass by but she pays them little heed. ]
If you think about it that way, I'm really just adding to your mysterious yet dashing vampire image.
You're moving the goal posts. This isn't about looking gentlemanly or silly. It is about who wins and loses, and nothing else.
[This is so dumb. And yet he keeps going.]
No. What you're doing is risking me walking into the office only for Jaskier to see this particular arrangement and to give us both hell until the end of our days.
I don't even know what goal posts are, you can't hold that against me.
[ Hilda, for one, doesn't care much about how dumb this is. She's fully committed to this argument and she intends to win it because there is no way that she is going to carry Alucard over a lost bet. ]
Jaskier is all you're worried about? I mean, I suppose being his business partner and friend being worried about that makes sense, but I'm neither of those things to him.
[ ...So in other words it's really just an Alucard problem. ]
What would he even say? And, if you're really that worried about it, you can put me down just outside the door of the office. That way he won't be the wiser.
First of all, you can infer meaning. Secondly, of course. Say you have a friend where you live on a reliable back and forth, and you're caught doing something either ridiculous or something that can be teased about into perpetuity. Would you let that chance slip away?
[The answer is no, and don't try lying to him Hilda.]
I am not in the habit of giving out low hanging fruit that is practically on the ground.
[ That only prompts her to grin a little wider, cheekiness edging into her voice as she dons the airheaded delicate flower act she's so used to wearing. ]
I don't know what infer means either.
[ She does, but it's more fun to act like she doesn't if it means riling him up a little more. ]
I probably wouldn't, no. But Jaskier seems like the type of man who does plenty of ridiculous things, so you could probably do the same thing right back to him. And besides this [ She motions to him holding her. ] isn't that ridiculous. How could he tease you about helping a hapless flower?
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[ It's a whine, but a whine with a mildly flustered blush all the same. She doesn't want to come blazing in to be anyone's hero or saviour. Sparring privately? Fine. But someone's life in the balance had been far too much work, far too much responsibility for her. The kidnappings had proven that much.
Okay, she hadn't been expecting him to throw his stupid sword into the air. Hilda's eyes follow it for only a brief moment before darting back down to him (training had been more effective on her than she otherwise claimed). She has to wonder what he's doing but she isn't going to stop - not with all this momentum.
So she does follow through on the strike - but bends her knees closet to the ground, changing the trajectory of her swing in an attempt to hook the back of her axe around his calf so she can tug him down. ]
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Alucard takes the fall. Lands flat on his back, sword clattering beside him. It is the easiest thing in the world to roll over towards it and rebound, aware that Hilda is at a three quarter angle from him now. He rushes, swiping for her mid section.]
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[ The last several words are part gasp as she hollows out her stomach as if that would somehow stop the sword from what would definitely be a killing blow. Her axe is too low to the ground to block it but she has to do something – her cowardice practically demands it.
The downside(?) to being her brother's sister is that she had the misfortune to pick up grappling skills too. If you aren't in a position to stop the blade with yours, try to disarm them instead, Hilda.
She tries a risky move – twisting her body to let the blade pass through a gap in her arm as she reaches to try and trap his arm so he can't move it.
Which would also effectively mean dropping her own axe and pulling him close into an embrace. ]
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[His greatest fear happened again, he's never letting it go.
Alucard is a fan of using whatever one has at their disposal. It is why he'll shift forms in a fight if that's what it takes to get him out of a tight spot. He's all set to do just that when Hilda tries trapping his arm, because honestly. It's a good move. Enough to force him to stop and either call this much a draw or find a less animal based way out of the situation.
Embrace it is, even if Alucard totally ruins it with:] I could turn into bats right now, you know.
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[ There's a gentle sympathy in her voice when she asks him. It's easier out of context to forget the state of him when they found him in the caves. She thinks him invincible, fearless, in some ways. It brings him down to a relatable level - not that she puts him up on a pedestal or anything. At least not as of late since getting to know him.
She realizes belatedly how close they are. It would be absolutely a little romantic - had it not been for that line. Her expression falls a little flat but the momentum she's still got pushes them several steps backwards, pressing into him. ]
Doesn't that fall under the vampire category? Can't we just have something nice like a little hug?
[ It transitions into more than a hug. Her feet trip over themselves, pitching her and her weight forward. ]
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[There's no point denying it, especially since Hilda knows the full truth of the situation there.
This is really getting quite ridiculous, and rather in defeat of the purpose of sparring.]
I'm fairly certain that in a fight, I'd have pushed you away or otherwise found a way to turn this into a fight with both of our weapons scattered to the wi--
[Hilda doesn't weigh that much, even with an axe. The problem is that it is unexpected. So Alucard takes both their weight and--
--okay, the angles are wild because his lips are definitely against Hilda's.
For a second time.
That's actually a novelty in and of itself, and the thought occupies Alucard's brain enough that he falls down on the ground entirely, aware that Hilda's being dragged along via momentum.]
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[ It doesn't even occur to her that he won't stop their fall because, vampire. But she's cut off, not by the surprise that they were in fact falling, but because his lips were on hers.
The weight of gravity practically presses her lips to his. Her eyes widen and just as they hit the ground, she has just enough common sense to flatten her hands against his back pressing them even closer. She pulls back a hair's breadth, eyes still wide like saucers, brain just white noise but all too aware about his aversion to physical intimacy. ]
Oh – uhm.
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They've both made it weird now. Alucard for breaking the fall by just taking the fall, Hilda being a good friend and well aware that Alucard and physical intimacy is something he's still working on getting through. What it results in is the dhampir just staring at Hilda, wide eyed and not wanting to shove her off but absolutely feeling awkward about the situation and--
--he tries to focus on the thing they're supposed to be doing.]
I think this is a draw?
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Despite being clearly flustered she lets out a tittering laugh. ]
I'm sorry – yeah, a draw sounds good.
[ She has the sense to scramble off of him, righting herself. When she's up on her feet she extends a hand out to him to help pull him up. By the time he's on his feet, she's smiling like nothing had ever happened. That's the best way to address it, right? ]
Did you want to go again? Or maybe it's food time?
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Best out of five?
[At least he didn't offer to be up for as many rounds as she was
as i almost typed. Alucard takes the offered hand, happy to totally ignore what just happened. And vowing that Jaskier is soooooo not finding out.]One skirmish does not count as a sparring session.
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but it does let us handwave further fighting]no subject
Hilda can't help the immediate look of incredulousness on her face at his suggestion. ]
Best of five? Why not best of three or something?
[ Regardless of what they decide to land on, it’s clear by the end that she’s tiring. Months of not properly training and keeping up her stamina with a weapon in her hand shows. Objectively however, it’s clear that her body still remembers what she’s supposed to do and the axe still feels like an unfortunate extension of herself. The last round sees her splayed out on her back staring up at the sky. Her chest heaves and she can feel a bead of sweat begin to form in her hairline and trickle down her forehead.
The feel of it only spurs the whine that wrenches from her lips. ]
I’m exhausted, please tell me it’s dinner time now.
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[It probably isn't a surprise that Alucard looks fairly put together in spite of the length of time they've spent romping about. There's a little sweat that means his shirt clings to his chest, but he's not panting. Not falling over. Nothing seems to remotely bother him, he might as well have gone for a walk in the park.
His sword is sheathed, and Alucard offers Hilda a hand up.]
I'll even carry your axe for you.
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Of course he looks fine. He looks fine in every sense of the word on any given day, even when he looks disheveled in the middle of a desert. She tries not to look too envious when he steps into view, and definitely brushes away the intrusive thought about what it would look like if he were more sweaty.
The offer is tempting. But as she takes his hand she gives him a bat of her eyelashes trying to look as pathetic as possible. ]
How about you just carry me instead as part of my consolation prize for losing so badly? I think my legs are jelly after that last round.
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Alucard wordlessly extends both arms and crouches down low.]
Very well. But then you're carrying your axe.
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Hilda pulls the axe across her lap, blade pointing away from Alucard before looking towards him expectantly. ]
Ready when you are!
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Wait.
He should have absolutely expected it, what is wrong with him.
Picking Hilda up is like carrying a pillow. It is easy to just scoop her up and wait just long enough so she can adjust the axe. Then he starts walking, the intended destination being the office he shares with Jaskier.]
This second part is not going to be a regular occurrence.
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The way she settles right in with a not-so-hiddden smile on her face as they walk through the streets of Cadens looks something akin to a smug cat.
The faux-innocence of her voice could either be endearing or nauseating. ]
Are you sure? I think we should add it in as a consolation prize for all future training sessions. We can’t really expect the loser to have to walk all the way home after losing so badly, right?
no html tags cat is hogging my arm..........
[He asks it with just as smug a tone.]
Is the cat Hilda
You'd like that, wouldn't you? But there's no way I could actually beat you in a fight even if you lost on purpose.
[ Also losing on purpose is her thing. He needs to find his own thing. ]
Also, how would I carry you? You're so much taller than me.
[ Said as if she hadn't carried Claude after a particularly long training session or when she had found him snoring and hunched over a table with books surrounding him. It is do-able - but she isn't going to let Alucard know that. ]
she is some days
[He grins, smug, and keeps moving forward. This really isn't a problem, but it's more fun to tease about failing to account for Alucard throwing a match.]
If you're so worried about carrying me, then don't throw out suggestions someone that aren't equitable to all parties.
yes good
[ To say that she looks completely unimpressed with the thought of something that she can absolutely see him doing is an understatement. ]
That's hardly the gentlemanly thing to do! Even if I could carry you, don't you think that would look silly? You don't want to look silly, do you?
[ She shifts slightly in his hold, mindful of the position of her axe. Her protest draws the looks of several of the locals as they pass by but she pays them little heed. ]
If you think about it that way, I'm really just adding to your mysterious yet dashing vampire image.
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[This is so dumb. And yet he keeps going.]
No. What you're doing is risking me walking into the office only for Jaskier to see this particular arrangement and to give us both hell until the end of our days.
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[ Hilda, for one, doesn't care much about how dumb this is. She's fully committed to this argument and she intends to win it because there is no way that she is going to carry Alucard over a lost bet. ]
Jaskier is all you're worried about? I mean, I suppose being his business partner and friend being worried about that makes sense, but I'm neither of those things to him.
[ ...So in other words it's really just an Alucard problem. ]
What would he even say? And, if you're really that worried about it, you can put me down just outside the door of the office. That way he won't be the wiser.
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[The answer is no, and don't try lying to him Hilda.]
I am not in the habit of giving out low hanging fruit that is practically on the ground.
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I don't know what infer means either.
[ She does, but it's more fun to act like she doesn't if it means riling him up a little more. ]
I probably wouldn't, no. But Jaskier seems like the type of man who does plenty of ridiculous things, so you could probably do the same thing right back to him. And besides this [ She motions to him holding her. ] isn't that ridiculous. How could he tease you about helping a hapless flower?
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do we want to try and wrap this soon before the event?
I think we can call it here.