[ His weak attempt at a joke is met with a faint smile. ]
I guess we'll never know.
[ But she can say now with certainty that she hopes that will never be the case.
An instinctive deflection is on the tip of her tongue when he asks her that. 'Nothing.' 'Everything is fine.' 'I'm not thinking about anything' - all of those phrases paired with a feigned yawn would have been enough to put the matter to rest at least for one more day. But they die on her lips when she sees the way he looks at her with such tender concern.
She should know by now that putting things off isn't the answer. There had been so many hard lessons learned that way. That doesn't stop the instinct to run in the other direction to rear its head. Her fingers curl against his warm skin, drawing faint meandering shapes as she allows silence to be the first thing to answer his question. It doesn't take long for her to steel her resolve. Even if it was second nature to dance around difficult conversations, she couldn't avoid everything they'd been through together real or imaginary anymore. Not when it was important and when it involved people that mattered more to her than her life. ]
Too many things - I don't even know where to start. I know I don't want to become a god, and I definitely don't want to live forever either. Sure, I'd have time to try a bunch of different hobbies and make things I'd never be able to do otherwise but I also didn't get to experience other parts of life that I think I want.
[ She quiets again. ]
But if it was a life where I could stay with you and Sylvain then maybe those other things wouldn't matter.
[ Because if they returned home to Fodlan, to their timelines, there was no guarantee of them. Nor was there a guarantee of anything really. But all her achievements and accomplishments that she had done on her own as a god paled in comparison to the companionship she had with them - at least she thought they did. She had only ever wanted love because what else would she be able to accomplish on her own otherwise? ]
no subject
I guess we'll never know.
[ But she can say now with certainty that she hopes that will never be the case.
An instinctive deflection is on the tip of her tongue when he asks her that. 'Nothing.' 'Everything is fine.' 'I'm not thinking about anything' - all of those phrases paired with a feigned yawn would have been enough to put the matter to rest at least for one more day. But they die on her lips when she sees the way he looks at her with such tender concern.
She should know by now that putting things off isn't the answer. There had been so many hard lessons learned that way. That doesn't stop the instinct to run in the other direction to rear its head. Her fingers curl against his warm skin, drawing faint meandering shapes as she allows silence to be the first thing to answer his question. It doesn't take long for her to steel her resolve. Even if it was second nature to dance around difficult conversations, she couldn't avoid everything they'd been through together real or imaginary anymore. Not when it was important and when it involved people that mattered more to her than her life. ]
Too many things - I don't even know where to start. I know I don't want to become a god, and I definitely don't want to live forever either. Sure, I'd have time to try a bunch of different hobbies and make things I'd never be able to do otherwise but I also didn't get to experience other parts of life that I think I want.
[ She quiets again. ]
But if it was a life where I could stay with you and Sylvain then maybe those other things wouldn't matter.
[ Because if they returned home to Fodlan, to their timelines, there was no guarantee of them. Nor was there a guarantee of anything really. But all her achievements and accomplishments that she had done on her own as a god paled in comparison to the companionship she had with them - at least she thought they did. She had only ever wanted love because what else would she be able to accomplish on her own otherwise? ]